


Heroes in Hogs Warts (Hogwarts, Kaminari, not Hogs Warts)

by wrackspurtsnargles



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: Class 1-A goes to Hogwarts, Gen, Humor, characters may be ooc, it's going to be a disaster
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:01:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24093250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wrackspurtsnargles/pseuds/wrackspurtsnargles
Summary: In a world of quirks, magic probably isn't the most amazing thing one could see. So, the Statute of Secrecy is repealed when Harry's still a student, and now wizards and witches are expected to play nice with muggles after years of staying hidden.It won't be easy, especially when their first point of contact is a class of crazy hero-hopefuls and their guardians, but eh, they'll manage.Probably. Hopefully.
Comments: 59
Kudos: 192





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I have no excuse other than the fact that, for some reason, I really wanted to see Class 1-A go to Hogwarts in all their insane glory. 
> 
> I love that class. 
> 
> so, chapters are probably going to stay short, updates will be sporadic, and Mineta will be replaced by an OC of my making (yes, for those of you who read Dreams in the Shadows, it's Yuuto.) Just saying before anyone mentions this, but I'm not replacing Mineta because I don't like him (though to be fair, I don't) but because I honestly have no idea how to write a perverted character. I don't want to accidentally turn him into a two-dimensional sandbag, so bye-bye, Mineta.
> 
> I hope anyone who reads this has as much fun as I did writing, and as always, any comments of any kind always make me happy :)

“Why,” said Aizawa flatly as he stared down at the class with dead eyes, “is it that the only time every single one of you gets an A in a test, it’s when I honestly don’t want you to. And no, Iida. I do not want an answer to that.”

Iida quickly lowered his hand while Uraraka giggled from the front of the room, barely bothering to hide her smile behind her hand. Aizawa felt a surge of irritation when he noticed none of his brats seemed particularly intimidated despite his best attempts at glaring them into submission. He knew he should have expelled at least one of them earlier in the year. How was he supposed to keep them in line when they thought he was _soft_ of all things.

The entire class was staring up at him with wide eyes, some, like Yaoyorozu and Todoroki stayed fairly calm, but far, _far_ more were practically vibrating in their seats with barely contained expectation. They were waiting for him to make the announcement, he knew, but like fuck he was going to say it aloud without prompting. He was against this. He’s _still_ against this. What, Nezu was thinking when he made the decision he had absolutely no idea, but he wasn’t going to try and understand, because understanding meant he actually had to _think_ about it and he _hated this_.

If he had his way, they’d pretend yesterday never happened and he’d go back to teaching them whatever it was they needed to know about heroics until they wouldn’t even dare think about yesterday’s announcement. They’d whine and complain but they’d follow, he knew. Being targeted by villains had done wonders for their overall maturity (though sometimes he felt a pang of _something_ whenever he remembered how they were still only fifteen - still far too young to be as mature as they were) and they’d understand even if they weren’t happy with his decision. 

Probably. Hopefully.

Unfortunately, though, he was just a lowly teacher who barely got a say in things, especially not when it came to decisions made by higher-ups even Nezu had to listen to, and he couldn’t pretend nothing happened. 

“So,” said Kirishima, ever the bravest and most willing to risk his neck for the sake of the class. “Does that mean we all get to go, sensei?”

The entire class froze. Even Midoriya had stopped mumbling to himself to look up at Aizawa with his childish green eyes and he felt his lips thin. 

He hated this. It was a terrible, _terrible_ idea, especially considering they were going overseas for _months_ \- but Nezu was right. They had to learn if they were going to be the kind of heroes they wanted to be. Not to mention keeping them here when they said they’d go just a year ago, would end up with the rift between the two worlds growing larger and Aizawa’s paranoia wasn’t worth it. Besides, it wasn’t like they hadn’t prepared. Hawks and Best Jeanist had offered to come along to help Yagi and Aizawa supervise, and if two from the top five wasn’t enough for him to feel comfortable with his class’s safety, then well. Hizashi might have had a point when he said he was being overprotective.

“Fine,” he muttered underneath his breath and a few students from the first row perked up. “Congratulations. Every single one of you brats managed to get an A in your latest English test. You all get to go.”

Immediately the entire class broke out into cheers. 

“Yes!” Kaminari shouted as he jumped onto his desk, ignoring Iida shouting, ‘the seniors, Kaminari! Show some respect!.’ 

“England! Magic! _Hogs Warts!_ ”

“I thought the school was called Hogwarts?” asked Todoroki.

“It is,” said Asui. “I think Kaminari just forgot.”

“ _Hogwarts!_ ” yelled Kaminari as he thrust his fist up into the air.

Fuck. He was already tired and he hadn’t even told them what to pack for the trip, yet.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaminari is stupid (which isn't anything new), Aizawa is jealous of Best Jeanist (which is definitely new), and Sir Nick is terrified of Dark Shadow (which is perfectly understandable).

“Todoroki, look, it’s a _castle_.”

“I know. I have eyes.”

“Hey Bakugou, do you think they’ll have merpeople in the lake?”

“How the fuck should I know?”

“Oh my god, did you see that? _It’s a giant squid_.”

“Hey, if someone cut off a leg and Todoroki cooked it, do you think it would be edible?”

“Kaminari. No.”

"I’m not saying I’m actually going to _try_ \- wait, do squids eat frogs or do frogs eat squid?”

“Neither I think.”

“I like squid, kero.”

“Same!”

The groundskeeper - Hagrid, if Aizawa was remembering correctly - squinted down at his brats as if he wasn’t quite sure whether they were serious or not. Aizawa wished he could say the same. He’d been around his class for far too long to not know the stupider an idea was, the more serious they were about it. 

“Ooh, look!” said Ashido as she pointed up at the sky. “We can see the stars!”

“Where? Oh yeah, we can!” said Kirishima cheerfully as he nearly tossed himself over the edge of the rocky little boat ( _safety hazard_ , Aizawa’s mind wouldn’t stop screaming) only for Shoji to catch him before he could actually fall into the lake. “Is that the Big Dipper?”

“ _That’s_ the Big Dipper, you idiot,” Bakugou snarled as he hauled Kirishima back from the edge. “And stay _still_ before you knock us all into the water.”

“Aw,” said Hagakure from a different boat. If Aizawa had thought she was hard to see during class, it was nothing compared to when she was wearing pitch-black robes, in the middle of the night, on a pitch-black lake. “You _do_ care!”

“Shut up,” snarled Bakugou, his hands lighting up with small explosions that rocked the boat precariously. 

“Bakugou,” said Aizawa, not even bothering to try to keep his exhaustion from his voice. 

“She started it!”

“What are you, five?”

“You’re _dead_ , Round Face.”

God, he was _tired_.

“How do they work, though?” asked Midoriya as he leaned over the side of the boat, his face just a couple of inches above the surface as he squinted into the water as if he were looking for some kind of mechanism to explain the impossibility that was rowboats rowing themselves across the lake. 

“Magic, obviously,” said Jiro dryly.

“But how does magic _work?_ ” asked Midoriya, completely utterly bewildered.

“If you ever find out, tell me and you’re excused from all assignments on international relations until you graduate,” said Aizawa dryly.

“That’s not fair!” exclaimed Kaminari. “What about us?”

Aizawa gave him the flattest look he could muster.

“I think Aizawa meant to say there wasn’t a point in trying to explain magic,” Takami supplied, the laughter barely hidden in his voice.

“But what if he _does_ find a way to explain it?” Kaminari insisted. “Midoriya’s, like, crazy smart.”

Midoriya immediately flushed bright red and began stammering. For a couple of seconds, Aizawa let himself revel in the feeling of having someone other than himself suffer because of how stupid his brats could be. Sure, technically, Midoriya was more embarrassed at Kaminari’s compliment than he was suffering, but hey, every little bit counts. His delight was short-lived when far too soon, the other side of the lake slowly came into view.

They’d almost arrived and he really needed his class to at least _pretend_ to be remotely presentable. 

“Kids,” he started to say, only to stop short when Sero let out a screech.

“I’m falling! I’m falling!” he squawked out, his arms pinwheeling at his side before dropping into the lake like a sack of bricks. 

Or, ‘almost’ dropping into the lake.

“Nngh,” Sero let out a strangled sound as he stayed hovering barely an inch over the surface, held up by a thread. Literally.

“Thank you,” said Aizawa and Hakamata nodded.

“You’re welcome,” he said, sounding far too amused for the situation. 

Aizawa liked his job - okay, that was an exaggeration - he just barely _tolerated_ his job, but still, regardless of whether he liked teaching impossible brats or not, he’d never thought there’d ever come a time when he’d feel jealous of _Best Jeanist_ of all people. If one of his brats did something stupid, like, say, falling into a lake when they were just a couple of feet from the shore, then it was his job to fish them out, make sure they were fine, and then chew them out for doing something stupid. All Best Jeanist needed to do was fish them out and laugh. 

And he _still_ had to make sure they were presentable. Fuck.

***

Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington was proud to say that hardly anything could faze him anymore.

True, that might have something to do with how he was dead and hardly anything could hurt him (the basilisk was an exception - but then again, how often does one see a basilisk in their entire life, let alone in their death?), but that didn’t mean he couldn’t still be startled. Just think - it’s been _years_ since Moaning Myrtle died in her stall on the second floor, but she _still_ cries whenever she thinks someone might be talking about her behind her back. (Though to be fair, they usually _are_.) Clearly, death does not directly affect maturity and poise, so the lack of any surprise on his part whenever the Weasley twins, or Peeves, or whoever else might have decided to try and surprise him, was still something he felt he had a right to be proud of. 

But, well, sometimes that pride conflicted with his integrity. For instance, whenever he felt he’d have to outright lie if he wanted to uphold his dignity.

Like now.

Nick let out a rather undignified yelp when a large black bird shoved itself into his face.

 _“It’s a_ ghost,” the bird said, sounding completely delighted as it rose above him, it’s talons extended, sharp and fierce, and Nick couldn’t let out a sound.

Merlin’s beard - after all this time haunting the halls of his beloved school, was this how he was going to go?

“Dark Shadow,” came a voice, flat but still somehow managing to convey disapproval, and the bird retreated back into the shadows.

 _“I was just saying hi,”_ it said, almost as if it were _pouting_.

The boy with _a bird’s head_ frowned at the creature until it shrank back. “I apologize,” he said as he nodded at a gaping Nick. “Dark Shadow can be… whimsical, at times.”

‘It’s perfectly alright,’ was what Nick meant to say. “Nngha,” was what actually came out.

The bird boy tilted his head at Nick and - oh Merlin. He wasn’t- that wasn’t-

The black monstrosity peaked out from underneath the boy’s robes and it was only then that Nick realized - the boy hadn’t banished the creature. _They were one and the same._

“Tokoyami!”

“Here, sensei,” answered Tokoyami, momentarily turning his attention away from the curiously pale and half translucent man. Dark Shadow had been distracted by something as they entered the Entrance Hall, and he’d had to go fetch him before he caused any trouble.

It was a bit too late, though, he mused as he turned back towards the man. Dark Shadow had already found and startled someone except-

Tokoyami blinked as he stared at the spot where the man had been just seconds ago.

“Where did he go?” he asked.

 _“He sank,”_ replied Dark Shadow. _“Into the shadows.”_

Tokoyami frowned. “He sank?”

 _“Like the shadow boy,”_ offered Dark Shadow. 

Oh. So he melted into them?

“I was under the impression wizards did not have quirks,” he mused and Dark Shadow shrugged.

_“Who cares how it works?”_

True. Technically, Tokoyami supposed it wasn’t any of his business, though he would have liked to have made sure the man was alright before he left.

“Anything wrong?” Hawks-sensei asked when he rejoined the group.

Tokoyami shook his head. “No, sensei. It was just Dark Shadow getting distracted by a wizard. Though,” he added almost as an afterthought. “Dark Shadow seemed to be under the impression that he was a ghost.”

“Really?” said Hawks. “Huh. You know - he might have been right, actually. I think someone said something about how sometimes wizards and witches leave ghosts.”

“What,” said Tokoyami.

“Didn’t you know?”

_“What.”_

_“Can I go say hi?”_ asked Dark Shadow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I forgot to mention at the beginning of the last chapter, but this isn't going to follow a particular plot, so, if there's a scene anyone wants to see, leave a comment and I'll see if I can fit it in. Have fun!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Draco suffers and Slytherin is rolling in his grave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> edited because, for some reason, ao3 decided to get rid of italics halfway through

He _knew_ Dumbledore was going senile!

Draco aimed a kick at Goyle underneath the table, and the larger boy let out a grunt before he slowly shuffled to the side. 

“Watch it!” Pansy hissed when he nearly knocked her off the bench in the process.

“Sorry,” said Goyle. He then proceeded to sit on the hem of her robe.

“Muggles,” muttered Theo from his seat next to Draco as he stared at the group of teenagers huddled at the front of the Great Hall. “They’ve brought _muggles_ to Hogwarts. What was Dumbledore thinking?”

“He wasn’t, obviously,” said Draco a sneer working its way onto his face. 

“Ugh," said Pansy as she wrinkled her nose. “Look at them - they’re like animals.”

“Almost literally,” said Blaise mildly as he tilted his head just so, so that he could see around Crabbe’s head without obviously staring. “Do you see that? Two of the muggles are half bird.”

“One’s got a _tail_.”

“ _That one has six arms. _”__

It was astonishing, really, how far muggles could fall. Bad enough that they couldn’t use magic - couldn’t even _contemplate_ magic’s existence even when it was practically shoved into their faces - but now? Now they’ve started using their own, obviously lesser version that turned them into some kind of odd _creature_. 

“Not all quirks are conspicuous,” said Tracey quietly. 

“Like that’s an excuse,” sneered Draco. 

“Come to think of it, aren’t Davis’s grandparents muggles?” 

Tracey scowled at Blaise who blinked back innocently. 

“It’s none of your business, Zabini,” she said cooly. 

Blaise just shrugged. “I was just curious,” he said with a charming smile. “Say, do _they_ have any extra limbs? A fang or two? Claws? Tentacles?” 

“If you must know, they’re quirkless,” snapped Tracey. 

“So they’re normal muggles?” asked Pansy. 

“Technically, they’d be the minority. Nearly 80% of the muggle population have quirks.” 

Everyone on their end of the Slytherin table turned to stare at Theo. 

“What?” said Theo as he raised his shoulders defensively. “You know I take Muggle Studies.” 

“I didn’t think you’d pay any attention,” mused Blaise as he tapped his chin. 

“Why wouldn’t I? I took the class because father thought it was good to learn more about them. Know thy enemy and whatnot.” 

“Really? I thought you took the class for an easy O,” said Tracey. 

“ _I_ thought it was because you’d lost a dare,” said Draco. 

“You took Muggle Studies?” 

Theo stared at Crabbe in pure disbelief. “I’ve been taking the class for two years,” he said slowly. “Where did you think I’d been going?” 

Crabbe shrugged. “Dunno. The kitchens?” 

\“Unbelievable,” said Blaise, sounding far too delighted for the situation. “I always knew Crabbe was thick but I didn’t think he’d be _this_ thick. Shame on you, Draco. You should have made sure your minions were better educated.” 

“I’m not in charge of them,” snapped Draco. “Besides,” he added with a sniff, “Crabbe and Goyle are my _friends_ not my minions.” 

__“Good to know you automatically include Goyle in ‘minions,’” said Theo dryly and Draco sputtered._ _

__The only thing that kept him from having to come up with a retort, was the beginning of the Sorting. The second Sorting._ _

“What are they doing?” Draco asked in horror as McGonagall called out a name - _Aoyama, Yuuga_ \- and a blond boy with eyes that twinkled almost as much as Dumbledore’s, pranced up to the stool before accepting the Hat with magnanimous grace. 

__“Sorting the muggles, obviously,” said Blaise._ _

“I see that. _But why_.” 

__“Didn’t you hear? Apparently, we’re getting new roommates for the next few months.”_ _

No matter what Theo might say, Draco did _not_ let out a whimper. 

__“It’s going to be fine,” said Pansy comfortingly as she leaned over to pat Draco’s hand. “The Hat won’t dare sort any muggles into Slytherin.”_ _

__“Won’t it?”_ _

__“Shut up, Blaise.”_ _

Merlin. _Muggles_. For centuries, the entirety of Hogwarts had been a sanctuary for young wizards and witches from the stupidity that was muggles. True, the handful of muggleborns did taint things a bit, but ignorant and lesser they may be, at least _they_ knew how to use magic. These muggles, obviously, did not. How were they supposed to live with them? Eat with them? Merlin, share _toilets_ with them? 

__Draco stifled the urge to gag and instead, let out a full-bodied shudder._ _

__“Is he alright?”_ _

__“Who cares? This is so much more fun than I’ve had in _years_.”_ _

__“You said that just a few hours ago.”_ _

__“Did I? Replace the ‘years’ with ‘hours’ then, if you would.”_ _

__Did they even know how to use toilets? Did they know how to flush? Turn on the water tabs? Brush their teeth? He’d heard muggles had people who took care of their dental hygiene - did that mean they couldn’t do it themselves? To the point that they needed an expert?_ _

__“Theo,” said Draco abruptly._ _

__Theo gave a start and stared at him warily. “... Yes?”_ _

__“Do muggles know how to use the toilet?”_ _

__“... Excuse me?”_ _

__“You take Muggle Studies, don’t you?” said Draco impatiently. The first muggle was taking an awful long time to sort. That was worrying. Very worrying. “Do they know how to brush their teeth? Wash? Use the sink?”_ _

__For a couple of seconds, Theo was silent as he stared at Draco, until he opened his mouth, enunciating each word slowly and deliberately as if he were talking to an idiot._ _

__“Yes, Draco. Muggles know how to use the toilet and the sink. They were the ones who invented them.”_ _

__Oh. Well._ _

Blaise burst into peals of uncontrolled laughter while _still_ looking like the model of pureblood grace, the lucky git, and even Pansy let out a strangled giggle. 

__“Shut up,” snapped Draco. He could already feel his neck and ears start to heat. Merlin, if he started blushing now Blaise would never let him hear the end of it._ _

__“I could lend you my textbook for Muggle Studies if you’d like,” said Theo, somewhere between sympathetic and disdainful. “It isn’t much, but a quick scan should help you with the basics.”_ _

“I don’t need it,” said Draco immediately. He’d take acting like a fool any day over getting caught in public with a book on _muggles_. Father and mother would be so disappointed with him if they heard from one of their associates that Draco had been dabbling in something as inane as Muggle Studies. 

__“Suit yourself,” said Theo with a shrug before turning back to the front of the Great Hall. “Look, I think it’s almost over.”_ _

__“About time,” huffed Pansy as she straightened in her seat. “Which house do you think sparkly boy’s going to get? I vote for Hufflepuff.”_ _

__“Gryffindor,” countered Tracey. “They’re all about being as unsubtle as possible. He’ll fit in perfectly.”_ _

__“He could be a Ravenclaw,” said Blaise, the occasional chuckle still breaking through. “He’s got the wise twinkling eyes.”_ _

__“As long as he isn’t Slytherin,” announced Goyle._ _

__“Don’t be daft,” said Draco. “There’s no way a muggle’s getting sorted into our House.”_ _

__***_ _

__He was wrong._ _

__“We will be the best of friends!” said Aoyama after squeezing himself in between Draco and Crabbe. He had one arm linked with Draco’s and the other was on the table, his chin propped up on his hand._ _

__Asui Tsuyu and Ashido Mina made their way to Hufflepuff and Gryffindor respectively, but Draco was too busy trying to pry the muggle’s fingers off of his arm to pay attention._ _

__“Did you hear that, Draco?” said Blaise, the traitor, with one of the largest grins on his face that Draco had ever seen on him. “You’re going to be the best of friends.”_ _

“ _Non, non_ ,” said Aoyama with a beatific smile that made Blaise falter just a fraction. “We shall _all_ be friends.” 

__“Merlin,” said Theo. He said nothing else._ _

__“This is horrible,” said Draco as he tried, once more, to pull his arm out of the muggle’s grip. He was having little success. “This is a nightmare, Someone pinch me - ow! I didn’t mean that literally!”_ _

__“At least things can’t get worse?” offered Pansy uncertainly as she stared at Aoyama as if she thought he’d start to scream obscenities while rolling on the table any second now._ _

__Personally, Draco thought it much more likely that he’d start emanating sparkles while dancing on the table._ _

__The muggle gave them a smile that was too bright and knowing to be human while his fingers, tangled in Draco’s sleeve, steadily turned whiter as they resisted Draco’s attempts at prying them off._ _

“You’ll see,” he said firmly as Crabbe started to help Draco with loosening his grip. “It will be the loveliest, the most dazzling, the most _enchanting_ friendship in history.” 

“Someone just kill me now, _please_.” 

__***_ _

__He nearly got his wish when exactly seventeen seconds later, Bakugou Katsuki blew up half of the Slytherin table after someone dared to call him ‘ordinary.’_ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to write this chapter from Harry's POV. That failed. So I decided I wanted to write it from the Sorting Hat's POV. Again, failure. So, Draco's POV it is.
> 
> It was fun :)
> 
> also - it might be a while till the next update. I've got nearly half a dozen essays I need to write until Thursday and it's horrible. I should have time to write by next week though! Hopefully!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hawks is a little brat.

Any hope his brats had at coming off as respectable, died a horrific death as soon as Bakugou was sorted. It was like watching an octopus getting boiled alive. Bakugou lit the fire. Hagakure fanned the flames. Kaminari made inappropriate comments. Midoriya was the octopus. Sero made more inappropriate comments. Uraraka tried to save the octopus by pouring oil over the entire thing.

He didn’t even know why he’d bothered hoping for anything else.

At least his brats had been sorted fairly evenly between the Houses. True, the combination of Bakugou, Hagakure, and Uraraka in one house, and Ashido, Kaminari, and Kirishima in another was worrying. And, because apparently life liked to fuck with him (or maybe that was just the sentient hat) so was Midoriya and Bakugou being put in the Houses with the greatest ‘rivalry.’ And Tokoyami getting sorted into ‘Raven’claw was a cosmic joke. And he had no idea how Sero had managed to land himself in the House where the defining traits were supposed to be intelligence and wisdom. And how, Todoroki was supposed to work with plants when every single one on the curriculum was sensitive to either the heat or the cold, he didn’t know. And he really had to tell Kaminari that no, the giant spiders in the forest weren’t there as a food source and Asui really had to stop joking about it with a straight face because Kaminari actually believed her-

“Earth to Eraserhead,” said Takami and Aizawa gave him the flattest look he could muster.

“The students will be fine,” said Yagi. “I am sure Hogwarts’ faculty will do their utmost to keep them safe.”

“Yeah,” said Takami with a grin. His wings stretched once before settling down. “Did you know they’ve got this sport where they fly around on magic broomsticks? There’s even a ball that goes out of its, way to knock kids off of their brooms-”

“Hawks,” said Hakamata warningly and the young hero let out a laugh as his wings fluttered behind him.

“Just joking,” he said cheerfully. “Not like I’d let any of them actually _fall_ , you know?” Though his voice stayed cheerful and bright, his smile died down into something more solemn. “Seriously, though. They’ll be fine. I mean, four pros for twenty kids isn’t a bad ratio.”

Yagi shuffled awkwardly on his feet, and Takami rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, I know you’re retired but you’re still _All Might_. They still listen to you and half of the trouble kids get into at school’s because they don’t listen, yeah?”

“True,” said Hakamata. “We’ll keep them safe,” he added and both Yagi and Takami nodded enthusiastically.

“The entire school’s a safety hazard,” Aizawa couldn’t help but point out. “The staircases move without warning. Students practice magic that can cause explosions if done wrong, with no supervision. There’s a forest less than a fifteen-minute walk from the front doors that’s called the Forbidden Forest because, apparently, they’ve got poisonous man-eating spiders that live there, and that’s discounting the other potentially hostile and dangerous creatures.”

“Don’t forget the sport where they fly around on broomsticks with no safety measures whatsoever.”

“ _Hawks_.”

“We’re already here,” said Yagi almost gently, ignoring Hakamata scold Takami, as he watched Aizawa in something that was an odd mix of fond and concerned. It was uncomfortable at best and downright annoying at worst. Aizawa resisted the urge to rub a hand over his face and scowled instead as Yagi continued, “The only thing we can do now is our best.”

As if their best had ever been enough.

Still, logically speaking, he wasn’t wrong. Aizawa reached into his pocket and pulled out a handful of papers. 

“These are the schedules for each House,” he said as he passed them around. “All of the core classes, with the exception of Astronomy, takes place as a sort of joint class where two Houses take a subject together. We need to work out a schedule about who’s attending which class. We’ve got permission to attend as long as we aren’t disruptive but McGonagall, Snape, and Umbridge didn’t seem pleased so keep that in mind.”

“Yay,” said Takami as he took a schedule. “School. I love school. I don’t actually have to listen, do I? I heard History’s taught by a literal ghost and that he’s awfully boring.”

“How do you already know that?” asked Yagi.

Takami winked cheekily. “I’ve got my sources.”

“What he means to say is that he’s a terrible gossip,” said Hakamata dryly as he looked over the schedule himself. “Potions with Gryffindor,” he mused before he looked up at Aizawa. “Would you like to take that class or should I?”

“If you would,” said Aizawa. “Hogwarts students have electives right after which means I have to prepare my own class.”

“That’s tough,” said Takami. “Anything else we’ve gotta know? Like, any of your kids allergic to toads or something? Do I need to bring them to the nurse’s office if they start turning blue and purple?”

“Regardless of whether they have any allergies or not, yes, you should bring them to the nurse’s office if they start turning blue and purple. Preferably quickly,” said Aizawa dryly. “That said - Yaoyorozu has confidence issues so look out for that. If you think she’s looking too down, point her to Todoroki. They get along well and he usually manages to encourage her enough. Ise tends to disappear if he feels overwhelmed but he usually shows up again in less than five minutes so you don’t have to worry about that. If he doesn’t show up even after you call for him, get me or Hakamata. You know how to deal with Bakugou,” he said as he turned to Hakamata, “so things should go fine in Slytherin, but Uraraka and Bakugou tend to get ridiculously competitive over the stupidest things so keep an eye out for any escalation. Hagakure might cause some trouble without Ojiro to keep her in check, but a stern talking to should keep her from doing anything actually stupid.”

“As for the kids in Hufflepuff,” he paused as he squinted at Yagi. “...... Fuck. You’ve got the mostly sensible ones. I want to switch.” 

Yagi clutched his schedule closer to his chest. “No thank you.”

“... Midoriya’s in Gryffindor.”

“Is that supposed to convince me?”

Aizawa raised an eyebrow. “I thought the Problem Child was your favourite?”

“I don’t have favourites,” Yagi lied blatantly, “and regardless - young Midoriya breaks his bones every other week. I believe that with his luck-”

“His lack of self-preservation you mean.”

“-it might… escalate. Hogwarts being a magic school and all.”

“Fuck,” said Aizawa as he scowled down at the list of students that have been sorted in Gryffindor. If any of his kids ended up on a broomstick flying after (or away from - he felt that was far more likely) sentient balls, it would be Midoriya. “I hate when you’re right.”

“Look at the bright side,” said Takami cheerfully. “At least the giant snake that lived in the girl’s bathroom was killed three years ago.”

“What.”

Takami - the little _brat_ \- grinned up at him as his wings fluttered behind him. “Didn’t you know? There was this giant snake - basilisk, I think, huge, poisonous, kills-you-with-its-eyes kind of thing - that went around petrifying kids-”

“No. Just no.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry for the late update! I probably mentioned this in the notes the last chapter, but school caught up with me so didn’t have time to write. That plus I’ve been working on my other fic as well so this, being much lighter and, to be honest, more of a fic I wrote just for fun, got pushed aside until I was done with that.
> 
> At least I'm done now? :)))
> 
> I intend to keep info on my fics (what chapter I'm working on, how far I've gone in the writing process etc) on my profile so if I'm late, check there and it should say how far I've gotten with my writing. ('Should' - I'll try to remember to keep my profile updated?)


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